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The last really clever idea I had

Posted 05-14-2010 at 12:32 AM by sweetiepie
Updated 05-14-2010 at 04:22 PM by sweetiepie

A few years ago, H and I went out to drink with the Canadians across the street. They talked about starting a restaurant. H and I didn't have any cool plans like that, but we were eager to live our lives too. Then we went home and went to bed, and I couldn't sleep. This thought, in its entirety, popped right into my head:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doomsday_argument

It was shocking. Not the idea itself, which is just a silly thing really, but how the whole damn thing slipped unannounced into my head, in the middle of the night, as though a fully-grown mouse, trying to escape the cold, had squeezed through my earlobe.

I've never taken much pride in my analytical ability. I've always been afraid of becoming someone's calculator, and surely I couldn't be more on that track now. But all my life I've also turned away from the dismal science, and swam upstream instead, through a whole river of art and music. Saying "yes, I'll think because it's fun and it's easy but I won't forget what it's like to feel either."

And even now that I understand that math is beautiful, rich with creative elements, the art of truth you might say, I still don't want to be one of those people whose smile stops short of his glasses, so I shunned my own ideas. But see how they come anyway. I hope they keep coming.
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